Grief

“When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.”- Helen Rowland

 

After several months of coming to terms with my divorce I thought I was truly ok with everything however every time I look at my kids I wonder if there was any way that I could have made my marriage work. I know that deep down it was time for us to end it because we were both miserable and no longer made each other happy.

However in the last few weeks I have been trying to overcome the anger that I have.

I am angry at everyone including god.

Yes it is wrong to be mad at god but right now I so angry about the fact that my life is not how I wanted ti to be and yes I know that life is not always however we want it to be.

The anger at this point is my security blanket. If I am angry then I don’t have to let anyone in and I won’t get hurt yet I know that I can’t raise my kids like this.

I am going to spend the next few weeks overcoming the anger and realizing that while the divorced happened and my life was turned upside down.  I was also given a second chance to life my life without being controlled by someone else.

Here’s hoping to the anger leaving me alone so that I can be a strong woman raising my babies.