Monday, September 2, 2013

Catching up


Has a funny way if sneaking up on you and changing how things are going. For the last 11 years I have been slowly and painfully working towards my goal of getting a masters degree. Well as of August 10 I am the proud owner of a masters degree. I actually won't walk until December( long story) yet I am done. 

This change in my life is odd. For te last 11 years I have balance motherhood, school, sometimes work and being a wife. Yet in the last two years a lot and I do mean a lot has changed. I am no longer a wife and while I still struggle with my divorce daily i know in the end it was the best decision for me. I wish my kids were by hurt in the process and yet they are stronger from it.

I am no longer in school and have no plans to go back. This has been a huge change. I am still learning how to be still. 

I have lost quite a by of weight. This has been a challenge for me. As my life has been in chaos the last two years the only thing I have been able to control is my weight. Yet is was a unhealthy obsession. Yes I sill struggle with the scale and have been plateaued longer than I would like yet I am proud of the fact that in the last year I have lost 50 plus pounds. 

My relationships with my girls have become so much deeper. My girls have seen my struggle and yet at the end of the day they know that I love them.  This time together has allowed me to see that I will miss them when they are older yet I am enjoying them like crazy. 

The biggest and greatest change is my relationship with the LOrd. I was raised in the faith yet as time and struggles came on I slowly and quietly walked away from him. When I first was divorced I was so angry with him and it took close to a year to get over being angry with him. It also took him putting some people who did not know me in my life to show me that I was worth the gift that he was giving me of allowing me to have a second chance with him. I really have learned how to rely on him. In the good and in the bad I tune to him and ask for guidance. I definitely know that even when his answer is no there is a reason why. 

As you can see I have grown and changed and I am becoming a better and healthier person. 

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